I Missed Halloween….But We Made Up For It The Week Before

Because I had to work. I was pretty damn upset about it.

Punky’s first trick or treating and I had to miss it because I was at work. (At a job where no one really appreciates a thing I do and I am constantly screwed over and walked on.)

But, last weekend we went trick or treating downtown at the shops in her costume. That was fun. It wasn’t the same thing – it wasn’t the same as Halloween – for real, but it was something. They parade the kids down the street and it was pretty darn cute to be a part of though. And she came home with tons of candy.

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That same night, was our annual Kids’ Halloween Party. Punky’s Grammy puts it on for all the kidlets in the family. She spent most of the party playing by herself.

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I dress for it too! I was Medusa this year. It was pretty damn awesome, if I do say so myself!

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So that was Saturday of last weekend. Sunday, one of my favorite people got married. We have been planning the wedding for months and it’s awesome that it came together as beautifully as it did! As well – she’s just one of my favorite people in the world! And doesn’t she make a beautiful bride!!

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On Wednesday, we played in the leaves in the yard. Throwing them and making lots of piles in the driveway. At one point, we made “leaf angels” while we waited for her godparents to come over so we could go hang out at the Pumpkin Patch. She was sporting a “braid like Elsa” and it was adorable.

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We headed off to the Pumpkin Patch and hand a nice afternoon with two of our very favorite people, her godparents. I swear, if Punky had a dad, this guy would be the best one for her. She’s got him wrapped around her tiny toddler fingers and I love it!

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And we picked out two gigantic pumpkins to carve that night, because I had to work the night before Halloween.

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And carve we did, that giant pumpkin.

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So…. I missed the traditional Halloween festivities, that she didn’t miss – she went with her Mama and godparents and our good friend Button and his mom. Unfortunately, I missed it, but it was still an awesome week to spend with her. I don’t have to work on the next two major holidays – so I will give them one to them, begrudgingly.

She did get to trick or treat last night and I put others on picture duty. It was not nearly as many pictures as we would normally have, but then again – no one can do Mamarazzi like me!

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Hope you had a great Halloween, we had a nice one with our Mini Minnie Mouse and some of our most favorite people. Here’s to Thanksgiving coming up soon!

Coming Out The Other Side

The week I learned I didn’t move on to get the supervisor position was more devastating to my psyche than I actually anticipated. I said some things, I did some things, I thought some things that I’m not proud of. I was shocked and I was overwhelmed and in the end, that whole week, I’m not sure what people thought of the hurricane that was me walking in shell of a person I had become.

I was angry, I was despondent, I was depressed and most of all I was confused. I am fairly certain that last week was one of the hardest weeks I have had to deal with and I am fairly certain it’s mostly because it wasn’t expected, I didn’t expect myself to react the way that I did. Without going into details, while initially my heart and spirit had a good outlook, in the end in, my emotions overtook and I unraveled.

By the end of the week, I’m not sure if people thought I was suicidal or homicidal. Neither of which were the case. Though, I do think that K may have thought about killing me periodically for all the shit I put her through that week.

I have come to really think about my situation and while I handled this poorly, I am going to rise above it. I am in a place in my job, frankly, I never ever wanted to be. I never saw myself there. And, when I said that to some people, they felt as though I was expressing my dislike for the people in that department or perhaps expressing that I felt I was too good for the job.

I would never, ever, want to make someone feel that way. That was not my intent. But, in my hurt feelings, my shock and my entire work life being turned upside down, I didn’t express myself in the way I likely should have. For that, I am sorry. I don’t know how many people actually dealt with me or came in contact with me that week and a half, but I know that I likely made them uncomfortable and they saw a side of me that I have worked so very hard to overcome.

In the end, I just needed a light at the end of the tunnel, something good to put me back to rights. Which is why I have such an awesome best friend and godparents for Punky. They got K and I tickets to Wicked which was playing last weekend and I was in absolutely the most happy place ever. It’s a simple gesture of kindness – an unexpected happy turn of events, to put me back in the mindset I needed to be in. The one where my spirit isn’t broken and I’m not willing to give up.  I needed that little extra push from the darkness and I am now back in the light.

I was as giddy as a school girl. If you asked K, she’d tell you it was like taking a 2 year to the movies for the first time. This is my most favorite muscial, though I have only ever heard the soundtrack and my very first Broadway show ever. So, needless to say, i was excited. The seats were awesome and the music started and I was so overcome with happiness I cried. Shhh.

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I have had time to adjust to the new position and actually allow myself to get to know the people I am now working with. Though I have been on the same team of people for the last 7 years, with the same supervisor and the same routine, this transition and this adjustment has been hard, hence the shock to my system and the darkness this change took me to. However, today I came to notice that I like this job. I’m good at this job. I will excel at this job. Not because I am believe I am above this job, but because I believe I can do anything I put my mind to.

I now look at it as a way to hone my skills even more to become even more an asset to this company and I will get the job when the time is right for me. So, while I am not proud of the things I have said or the damage I have caused in the reputation I have worked so very hard to build – I am willing to put in the hard work to see thing through.

Now, besides the doom and gloomy stuff, it’s Halloween soon!! We have a costume for Punky and it’s going to be adorable. We are making it a family affair. So I give you the little Snow White! I will be the evil queen and K will be the Huntsman.  More pictures to follow when Halloween parties have commenced!

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Hope all is well with each of you, dear readers, because I haven’t had a chance to keep up with the blogs like I would like to, but I promise I am lingering still – hanging out around here, sending great big positive vibes to those of you who are pregnant, trying to get pregnant or those who have just had little ones!

Take Care until next time.

Our First Halloween with Peyton

So, this will be a tiny little post, mostly full of pictures, but Peyton was so cute in her Halloween costume. We had a Halloween party at her grandmother’s house for all the grand kids last Saturday. We won’t be dressing her up and Trick or Treating. People asked me why we weren’t taking her out and there are several reasons. 1. Because its too cold to take her out. 2. I don’t want to be that mom wheeling up my 8 month old and asking for candy she can’t even eat!

Haha.

Who would have thought we would be celebrating so many firsts!? The time goes so quickly. Just yesterday I was thinking about how our baby will be a year old in just a few short FOUR months. Jeez. And just think, last Halloween she was dressed up like this:

I am 22 weeks pregnant last Halloween. Seems like a lifetime ago!

But anyway, I thought I would post some pictures of the cuteness that is Peyton in her very first Halloween costume. We will be saving it in her memory box for her first year items, pictures, and letters.

And of course, here’s a picture of Mommy on Halloween at work.  
Happy Halloween everyone, be safe and have fun!!