Slightly Broken With A Silver Lining

So, it was a no go in the supervisor spot and I will be back to my regular hours tomorrow. I will be moving to a different department than I left two and a half month ago. It’s a department I never pictured myself in and I’m pretty darn anxious about the transition.

However, it’s a stepping stone down the path I want to go down, supervisor. I have now interviewed for this position twice and while I don’t believe I agree with most of the feedback, the one feedback I do agree with is “You are too emotional.” I will be working on it. I am going to spend this time hardening my spirit, it’s been broken, and now, I will rebuild it.

I’ve weathered more than this in the past and it will not cause me to give up. I know that I will be a great supervisor some day. I know that I will be the best supervisor anyone has seen in our building. I just have to work on my anxiety and my emotions.

This new department is a road block, but it will hone my skills and make me formidable, I know it. I am determined to get this position. One way or another. The quote K sent me rings true and I have printed it out to put on my computer monitor at work to motivate me even more. “Sometimes to get what you want the most, you have to do what you want the least.”

I’m taking this seriously and I will get what I want. Not today. Perhaps not tomorrow, but I will not give up that easily.

In other news, K and I took Punky to the art festival yesterday. Instead of looking at art, Punky heard a band playing down the street and took off running for it. We sat and listened to the band for some time and she stole the show. Everyone was watching her dancing. It was hilarious really.

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While dancing it out, Punky also discovered her shadow. She found it quite awesome to chase her shadow around. I swear, little baby running is so freaking adorable to see!

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We also attended a baby shower that I helped host today. She was again the star of the show. The mom-to-be didn’t really seem to mind, seeing as she was cooing all over the kiddo!

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No matter how bad the day is, my day always starts and ends with this little girl. My miracle child that makes my heart overwhelmed with so much love it’s overflowing. At the end of the day, nothing matters more than the happiness of this little girl. Oh … and making sure she fits in her clothes. She’s currently wearing 2T and it may fit her for another week or so!

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Here’s to a better week starting tomorrow! Wish me luck in my new venture to build resilience and a hardened emotional shell.

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17 thoughts on “Slightly Broken With A Silver Lining

  1. It’s always tough getting critical feedback especially after the fact. But it sounds like you are amped to make positive changes and the next time you can be confident going up for the position knowing you did everything you could to be a better candidate. Hang in there, transitions are scary but you’ve got two awesome people to come home to at the end of a stressful day šŸ™‚

  2. Boo. So sorry about the job. It’s so hard to hear things like that and not internalize them. I hope you can find a balance of staying true to yourself while also building the skills you need for the position. That kid sure is cute though, do I imagine that helps a bit when the days get tough. Sending you good job woo.

  3. You are amazing Rachael! I know I have told you this before but I am telling you again. You are such an inspiration to me. I look up to you as a mom, a friend, a cousin, a business person, the list goes on. Way to keep your eye on the prize and keep your head up! I look forward to the day when we will all say to you! YAY! CONGRATS! YOU MADE IT! And as usual your punky is adorable! šŸ™‚

    • Aw, Sam! Thanks for your kind words. You are so sweet. Wish you lived closer, I just know Pyper and Punky could get to play and be great friends! I’m sure now is not my time, but it will be soon. I have a plan in place and I’m going to make it work! Thanks for all your support!

  4. Dang it! I had my fingers crossed for you but I’m still pretty darn sure you’ll get it eventually. This seems to be something you’ve decided will happen one day, so it will! I’m going to need to borrow the quote K sent you. I’m in a very similar situation to yours – post on that coming soon.

    Could P get any cuter? Seriously! šŸ™‚

    • You can totally steal the quote, she found it on pinterest and now it’s on my computer monitor. It’s helped a great deal. It’s not my time today, but it will be. Punky is just ridiculously cute, I can’t get over it! šŸ˜› Can’t wait to read about your own situation.

  5. Well that stinks about the job! But I think you are on the right track, and are doing all the right things to eventually get the promotion you deserve. And you get to go back to regular hours, right? So more time with Punky and putting her to bed? That’s gotta be a pretty awesome silver lining too.
    Chin up, I see good things for your future!

    • Yea, I do get to put her back to bed and do all the fun things I was doing with her at night. So, it’s a nice little silver lining, you’re right! It sucks to not get the job for the second time, but I will make it work. My time will come.

  6. Sorry about the job promotion. Just hang in there, another will come around , and if you work hard on the areas that was commented on you will get to where you really want to be. It will just take time and patience. So enjoy your time with Kim and Punky. They will help you thru anything!

  7. I’m so sorry to hear about the job. But I am super impressed with your ability to look at the bigger picture. I have to remind myself to do that often. I cannot believe how big Punky has gotten. She is almost out of 2T clothes. That’s crazy. I think I might just be a little jealous as I am the mother of two very tiny boys. I will be sending you positive thoughts on the job front. Have a good week.

    • Thanks, Mary! It’s quite a blow to the ego, but eh, I’m sure I will get it eventually. Punky is bigger than she’s supposed to be, length wise mostly, so don’t be too jealous! Lucky for us, we get her clothes handed down to us from a family friend!

  8. Love, love, love the pics of Punky! I remember those days. (Big sigh.) That is such a great age.
    Sorry to hear about your job, but you have amazing spirit and determination. I have no doubt you will get what you want with that attitude. I just wanted to say that you don’t need to do this to be a good supervisor: “… I am going to spend this time hardening my spirit…”

    “Successful leadership is not about being tough or soft, sensitive or assertive, but about a set of attributes. First and foremost is character”
    ā€” Warren Bennis

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