To Punky, in the wee hours of the morning,
I find myself getting ready for work and I get to peek in on you for just a short moment. I brush my fingers through your hair and I tell you to give Mommy just a few minutes and I will get your bottle.
While I fill the bottle in the kitchen, I can hear your soft cries, while you lay in your bed in the dark. I smile to myself, because one day you will know what it means when I say, “Give me a minute.”
Every morning I return to your bedroom, the same way as yesterday, and you smile up at me though sleepy tears and we start the day with the same routine as days gone by.
Clean butt and a warm belly full of milk and off to bed again you go. I kiss your cheeks and whisper “I love you” before I lay you back down and cover you up. I find myself looking down on you, just one last time before I have to close the door and leave for the day.
All day long, I think of you. I tell stories about you. You are the mascot of my team at work. They all look forward to new stories and pictures, OR, they simply indulge my new mommy ways of pushing you on people.
I count the minutes until I get to come home. 8-5 is way too long, before I finally get to drive home and eat dinner with you. Those 8 hours when I don’t know what you are doing. When I can’t see your little face. When you can’t drive me crazy and make me frustrated.
At work I wonder what you are doing. I wonder if you are thinking of me. Do you worry that Mommy won’t come home? Do you look for me? I wonder what you think of during the day. What new things you are learning. What fun things you are doing.
I wonder what I miss.