Stop Asking Me That One Annoying Question
When two women decide it is time to have a child together, the first thing people ask is, “How did this happen?” You would never really believe how often this question is asked, until you actually lived it. Its like the catch all question. Its the first and most important question when we announce we are having a baby, or when we go to the doctor’s office. Its easy. I will break it down for you.
Sperm, meet Egg, Make a Baby.
|5 weeks 2 days
Really, its as simple as that. I can’t understand why it is necessary to know just how it is that I have accomplished this task. We all know how babies are made. We are all aware there is no such thing as a stork and it most certainly didn’t drop a child down the chimney for us.
The real answer. I had sex. I had a lot of sex. In fact, I had a week full of sex with a man I barely knew. Why you ask? Because my partner and I wanted a child that badly. Apparently, it takes a week of sex and some charting of my ovulation and TADA I have a baby in my belly.
In the beginning, this question embarrassed me, because well, no one wants to talk about having sex with perfect strangers. Your doctor, the nurse, the ultrasound technician, that one girl from high school you barely remember who friends you on Facebook.
Now, its just par for the course really. We wanted a child. We did what needed to be done to have a child. Was it tough on our relationship? Please tell me who wants to know that the one they love is in the other room with someone who can in fact produce the golden ticket to a child when you cannot. OF COURSE IT WAS TOUGH.
Its almost as if people are jaded by monogamous relationships that can survive just about anything. Let me tell you, we have been through a lot in 8 years. This is just another notch on the timeline in our relationship. I am not like other spouses, partners, lovers, significant others out there.
Most people have been known to run when their partners are diagnosed with any array of mental illness, physical ailment, or debilitating disease. Not me. Frankly, I loved this person before they were stuck with a stigma, a label, an extra character flaw. Love is about loving everything about that person. Love is about the flaws. Its not about rainbows and kittens.
So, please continue to ask me how I became pregnant. Be sure to ask me if it was tough on our relationship. Be extra sure to say how much you just couldn’t have done it. And also, continue to make sure I know how weirded out you are that I am in a lesbian relationship with a woman who has been diagnosed with BiPolar disorder and live in a third floor apartment we can barely afford.
I am aware that inside that not too polite head of most people, they think we aren’t cut out to be parents. I am equally aware that they think its wrong and it is a bad idea.
They can continue thinking it. These people are entitled to their opinions, can even voice them if they want.
I just reserve the right to tell them to shut the hell up.